Talking about sex is awkward for almost everyone.
That's not a flaw, it's just where we start.
Kink & Sexuality Exploration
Most people find it surprisingly hard to talk openly about sex — whether that's with a partner, or even just with themselves.
Not because they don't want to. Not because they don't have things they want to say. But because sex is one of those topics that carries so much weight: vulnerability, fear of rejection, fear of judgment, not wanting to hurt someone you love, or simply not having the words for something you've never said out loud. It often just... doesn't get talked about. And the longer it doesn't, the harder it gets.
Maybe you've been together for years and realized you've never actually had a real conversation about what you both want. Maybe one of you has desires or interests the other doesn't share, and you're not sure how to even begin that conversation. Maybe you're in a relationship structure outside of typical monogamy — polyamorous, open, ENM, swinging — and you're navigating something the mainstream therapy world hasn't always known how to hold well.
Or maybe you're on your own with this — figuring out what you want, what you're curious about, or what feels true to you — and you just need a space to explore that without judgment.
Or maybe you're kink-identified or kink-curious, and you need a therapist who isn't going to flinch, pathologize, or quietly judge what you bring into the room.
All of that is welcome here. Exactly as it is.
You might be in the right place if...
You and your partner(s) feel stuck in a sexual rut, not in crisis, not on the brink of anything, just not quite where you want to be, and you're ready to actually talk about it with some support.
One of you has desires, kinks, or interests the other doesn't share, and you want help navigating that conversation in a way that feels safe, honest, and respectful, for both of you.
You're in a non-monogamous relationship structure (open, polyamorous, ENM, swinging, or something else entirely) and you want a therapist who genuinely affirms that structure rather than treating it as the problem to be solved.
You're kink-identified or kink-curious (whether that's BDSM, leather, rope, DD/lg, age play, or something else — the list is long and all of it is welcome) and you want a space where that's just... normal.
You're an individual wanting to explore your own sexuality, kinks, or desires, without any agenda other than understanding yourself better.
You've never quite had the space to figure out what you actually want sexually, and you're ready to start exploring that, on your own terms.
You want to figure out what you actually want sexually (individually or together) and learn how to ask for it in a way that works for your life and relationships.
You're in a monogamous relationship and want to build a richer, more honest sexual connection with your partner — from scratch, or from wherever you currently are.
How this ‘sexuality exploration’ works.
This isn't crisis intervention or conflict resolution. If you're looking for a referee for ongoing arguments, this probably isn't the right fit — and I'd rather be honest about that upfront.
What this is, is a guided conversation about sex and desire: whether that's with a partner, or entirely on your own. What do you want? What haven't you been able to say — or even admit to yourself? What are you curious about that you've never had a safe space to explore?
A lot of this work starts with the individual piece, regardless of whether a partner is involved: knowing what you actually want before you can ask for it, or before you can even make sense of it. Most people haven't spent much time really sitting with the important questions: what do I like, what am I curious about, what feels good, what doesn't, what have I never tried but wondered about? We work on that. And for those in relationships, we then work on how to bring that authentically into the partnership.
When partners are part of the picture, a big piece of the work is sexual communication — what happens when you don't want the same things. How do you ask for something your partner isn't sure about? How do you hear a 'no' without shutting down? How do you find the places where your desires overlap and build from there?
These conversations, when they go well, change things. Not because everyone suddenly wants the same things, but because there's finally a shared language and a willingness to be honest about it.
You don't have to arrive with that language already. That's what we build together.
A note on kink, different ‘flavors’ of sexuality, and ENM relationships
Kink is not a disorder. BDSM is not abuse. Non-monogamy is not dysfunction. These are not things I need to be convinced of — they are the framework I bring to this work.
If you are kink-identified, kink-curious, enjoy other ‘flavors’ of sex in addition to ‘vanilla,’ or part of any alternative sexuality community (and whether you're navigating that within a relationship or entirely on your own) you will not be pathologized here, you will not have to justify your interests, and you will not have to manage my discomfort while you talk about your life.
The same goes for how you do relationships. Monogamy is one valid way — it's just not the only option. Whether you're monogamous, polyamorous, open, ENM, swinging, relationship anarchist, or somewhere beyond any of those labels, this space holds your structure as valid without needing to fix or explain it.
What I do care about — across all of it — is consent, communication, and that whatever is happening feels genuinely good for everyone involved. That's the lens. Everything else is yours to define.
Why treatment specialization matters here:
Kink, sexual exploration, and relationship diversity are areas where even well-meaning therapists can get it wrong — not out of malice, but out of a lack of training and exposure. Pathologizing kink as a symptom of something deeper, treating non-monogamy as the problem to solve, or simply not knowing enough to ask the right questions. It's subtle, but you feel it. And it makes people stop talking.
As an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, I bring a framework that treats kink, alternative sexuality, and relationship diversity as normal human variation — not red flags, not issues to work through, not things that need explaining before we can get to the real work. We just start from there.
I've worked with individuals and couples navigating kink disclosure, attraction differences, relationship structure transitions, and sexual self-discovery across a wide range of identities and experiences. What most of them have in common is that they've never had a space where this felt genuinely normal to talk about.
That's what this is. And it makes a bigger difference than most people expect.
FAQs
Do we have to be in crisis to come to therapy for this?
1
Not at all — and honestly, the people who get the most out of this work are often the ones who aren't in crisis. If things are generally okay but you've hit a wall, feel stuck in a rut, or just want a richer and more honest sexual connection, that's a completely valid reason to be here. You don't have to wait until something breaks.
What if we want different things sexually — can therapy actually help with that?
2
Yes, and this is actually one of the most common things people bring into this work. Wanting different things doesn't mean you're necessarily sexually incompatible; many times, it means you haven't yet found a shared language for the conversation. That's very workable. We figure out what each of you actually wants, where there's overlap, and how to navigate the places where there isn't — with honesty and without anyone feeling like they lost. I need to be clear, though: Therapy cannot make someone into what you are or take away an interest. No therapy can do that, as we are wired to like what we like.
What if I'm embarrassed to say what I actually want?
3
Then you're in good company: most people are, at least at first. You don't have to arrive ready to say everything out loud. We go at your pace, and usually the embarrassment fades pretty quickly once you realize nothing you bring in here is going to shock me or change how I see you. That shift tends to happen faster than people expect.
Do you see people individually for this, or only in relationships?
4
Both. Individuals are just as welcome here as couples or any other relationship configuration. Exploring your own sexuality, figuring out what you want, or processing something you've been carrying alone are all completely valid reasons to come in on your own. You don't need a partner to do this work.
What if my partner isn't open to my kink or interest?
5
That's one of the harder conversations — and one worth having with some support. Sometimes a partner needs more information, more time, or a different kind of conversation than the ones you've been able to have on your own. Sometimes there's a real mismatch that needs to be navigated honestly. Either way, you don't have to just sit with it or act on it in secret. There's a lot of ground between those two options, and that's exactly the kind of thing we can work through together.
The conversations you’ve been putting off? This is a good place to have them.
Whether you're coming in as a couple, as an individual, or just trying to figure out where to start, this is a space where talking about sex is the whole point. No awkwardness required. Well, a little awkwardness is fine. It usually doesn't last long.
Reaching out is the hardest part. Everything after that, we figure out together.